Thoughts spilling out of the brain pan

Pretty much straight from break, I started my intership. It's been going well I think. Busy though. They like to give me many assorted tasks to do so I'm never really too bored. I'll chronicle my times as an intern at a later date.

Lately, I have been just feeling overwhelmed by many different emotions. Holiday time, as it has been for the last several years of my life, leaves me feeling very mixed emotions. I don't exactly have a close-knit family. And well... things happened this last year that I think has had a resounding effect on family relationships or... well... lack there of. I don't know. I feel pretty disconnected and unsure about everything.

Maybe I'm just tired. Maybe it's hormones. Maybe I need to start trusting and quit doubting. I have to admit... right now, it's become really hard for me to trust. I'm having a hard time gaining any perspective on the picture of things right now. I'm sure a year from now, this part of the picture will make more sense because my perspective will have shifted.

But from where I'm standing right now, it's really hard to see anything clearly.

I SURVIVED!

Fall semester of my senior year? Done.

After exorbitant amounts of caffeine (I'm pretty sure the energy drink count is around 20+), many late nights and one all-nighter, many long work shifts at Arby's, making new friends, hanging out with old friends (missing a few). After much laughter, tears, joys, ups, downs, and being spun about. After much homework, verse memorization, reading, quizzes... I have survived this semester.

One down. One to go.

More to come later as I start my Christmas break. :)

Whoa.

Needless to say, I can NOT believe how quickly time has flown by me this semester. It has been crazy, scary, interesting, busy, and a growing experience. I have been going through so much lately that it is hard to keep up with the little things (such as blogging) because I have a hard time keeping up with the big things (such as homework).

I work at Arby's now. It's interesting. I'll expand upon it sometime, but this is just a quick post so I'll save it for later.

So for now, I am going around the busy ant hill of my life, frantically trying to get things done as I push toward the end of the semester.

A post about an eight-legged fiend...

Once upon a time, (actually, tonight to be exact) I was in the bathroom when I spotted a horrendous sight! Brown and black with long legs and an unseemly face. What was it you may ask? An intruding spider!

After amassing enough courage to go near it, I trapped it in a cup. As I was putting paper underneath of it, I may have squeaked (or to some it might have sounded like a small scream). I was afraid that the creepy little thing would escape when I tried to put the paper underneath the cup. Luckily I had the foresight to use a cup I can see through.

Because of the commotion in the bathroom, my suitemate and her friend pondered whether I was in peril. But alas! I opened the door to show them what I was doing. They understood my plight and gave suggestions such as "squish him!" or "spray him with hair spray."

I thought I'd try one of their suggestions. Thinking that my ninja skill with hair spray would suffice, I picked up the cup and sprayed at the multi-legged fright. BUT I was not quick enough for as I sprayed, he scurried with all his might to get away... and went where I could not see him.

Not one to let our bathroom be under siege by such a frightening invader, I moved things out of the way while my suitemate shined a light on the situation (with her flash light). Attempt after attempt was made, but he still evaded my offensive maneouvers. Then finally, I prevailed against this dastardly villain.

He was laid to rest quickly. Such an adventure was to some extent, entertaining, but not one I want to repeat anytime soon.

A Picture Post

Psalm 19:1 The heavens heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims His handiwork.

Just a quick post

So. I have not been a faithful blogger. Sorry.

I had a great summer. Will post a more interesting blog with pictures about it sometime.
I'm already a week and a half into my senior year. I feel like I've already been at it months already.
Don't get me wrong. I love school. Learning and studying is kinda my thing. Yeah... BUT... I'm tired already. Silly. I know. Well... speaking of studying... I should be doing that now...

So I will end this blog post with some verses that have kept coming up in my life lately. They are a comfort to me when things in life are crazy.

Psalm 121:1-2

I lift up my eyes to the hills.

From where does my help come?

My help comes from the LORD,who made heaven and earth.

It's Been A While...

Life has been ever crazy. Between the school, studying for finals, crazy times with friends, and saying good bye to the most amazing friends a girl could ever have for the summer... We could say that I have been busy.



Coming home is always an interesting business. I never know what to expect and what's going to happen. After my third year of college, I've learned that coming home for the summer has been a test of what I learned over the school year mixed with more lessons on growing up.



Life always seems to get more complicated, and sometimes even more difficult. Every day is different, and some are better than others. I feel like I'm paddling in uncharted waters without a clear direction. Sometimes I'm tossed by waves of uncertainty and hit by thunder storms of pressure from different influences. Sometimes I think it's all too much...



But in the middle of it all, there is a light that burns brighter than anything else. It's my saviour, Jesus Christ, who is guiding my way back to Him. I don't always know what direction I'm going but I know that I have a relationship with God that is a solid place to keep me anchored.

I make mistakes. I don't always say or do the right things. I'm a young adult trying to crawl out of her awkward and introverted shell. But I keep learning, and I keep growing.

Will I ever have all the answers? Most certainly not. Will I continue to be a student of life? Most emphatically yes.

Continuing to Recover

I haven't posted for a while about my injury. Physical therapy ended the last day of last semester. They even gave me a t-shirt! Since then, it has been like taking one step at a time on the road to recovery.

Over break I had gone to the doctor who attended to me when the accident happened. I have one more appointment coming up in a few months. The doctor had said so far, I'm doing well, but he pointedly told me that I needed to lose weight to help relieve the pressure on my hip. The activities that I can participate in are quite limited when it comes to my hip. I can't do sports or run. Walking is okay if I'm smart about it. So basically I can do the bike or elliptical. I miss playing soccer... and I hope that someday I will be able to play again with out having to worry about injuring my silly hip.

When someone chucks the crutches or whatever they had to help them with their injury, one usually doesn't think about that injury anymore because that person is back to normal. I have learned that "normal" won't be achieved for quite a while yet. It has been so neat how slowly I am getting better. I don't have to use a grabber (yes, just like an older people use) to put on my socks. I even tied my shoe while it was still on my foot the other day. This is quite the achievement since I have not done so since my accident happened. I am regaining my flexibility slowly, but it's taking work. The last week I have worked out almost every day for a good amount of time.

Does my hip still give me pain? Sometimes. Like if I over do it at a college activity (which was SO much fun by the way), or sometimes I just step wrong and the muscles around my hip didn't like what I did. Such pain, however, is nothing compared to the first months after my accident. God has been so faithful and helping me through this situation. His grace always amazes me.

So there. An update on my hip and the road to recovery. It's a long path to tread, but I have an Awesome God and great friends who encourage me as continue onward towards full recovery.

A Quick Post Between Classes

Hello all! As I have expressed before, this semester has been quite the rollercoaster of projects, homework, and tests at every rise and fall. Next week will be Missions conference already. I am super excited because the pastor from the church in Erlangen, Germany is one of our speakers. It is always nice to see the people who I met over seas.

Speaking of such people, I was able to see the couple we spent time with our first week there a few weeks ago. Ted and Becky are currently on furlough and live only a few blocks from the school. They are such a fun couple! They, of course, fed us, and we were able to catch up for a bit. Just like all the other people we stayed with, Ted and Becky have such an interest in what is going on in our lives and wanting to know what are plans are. I love knowing that there are people praying for me as I make different life decisions.

So, my junior year is almost over! Isn't that so unreal? By this time next year I will be interning, pumping up my application, and getting ready to graduate! It sometimes feels a bit a unreal, but that excitement of achieving a degree is starting to creep in as well. As of late, I have been thinking a lot about my future but I will save my musings for a separate post.

God's goodness always astounds me. You'd think that I would always remember how He is in control and remember His love and care for me. But honestly? There are times that my focus is so skewed that God has to do something to turn my gaze towards Him. He gives me the grace and strength to live each day. I will especially be relying upon that today as I finish up papers, presentations, and study for my 3rd exam for this week.

Well, it's time to head to public speaking. Hopefully the ant hill will calm down enough for me to post again soon. :)

A Marvelous Monday

Coming into this week, I thought I was going to be facing much more obstacles to get things done than I have actually faced.

Here's the thing: I am going to Missouri this weekend with a friend to visit a college she's looking into because it has the program she is interested in studying. We're leaving Thursday afternoon so we can visit classes on Friday.

MEANING, I have to get my homework, projects, and a midterm done early.

Yeah, now you see what I probably was thinking. I thought I'd have to rush, rush, rush to get things done and possibly collapse while doing it. Last week, I was combating a cold which left me feeling very weak this weekend. I also did not get a great amount of sleep this last weekend. Someday I'll get sleep... So, with a very tired mind, I made a concept map (you know, with all the connected bubbles) of all the things I needed to get done by Thursday. This was suprisingly helpful.

As Mondays go, this has been a pretty great one, despite the cold and light snow. God put in my heart a joyful attitude despite being tired. I was able to stay awake (mostly) in my classes and chapel. I have awesome professors who have been given much wisdom. On top of that, they love to share it with their students who they care about. So after classes, I ran off to go get errands done. I cashed a check, paid a bill, shopped for fleece (which was on sale!!) within about an hour and a half worth's time. I was super pumped.

Then, it was off to the computer lab. Now, keyboarding is not a hard class, but it has a lot of work. Thankfully, the work this week is super duper easy. Golden star award goes to the one who has it all done already! All I need to do now is drills, a.k.a. the icky/frustrating/wanna-pull-my-hair-out part. Yeah... it's kinda that dramatic.

Now, all I have to do is study for/then take my crisis counseling midterm, make an outline for the book of Ruth, read my Doctrine IV reading, figure out my topic for my persuasive speech for public speaking, prepare a devotional for tomorrow night, send out some e-mails... oh, and pack. :)

Lately, God has been stretching my mind in my way of thinking through my classes and the ministry of my church here at college. I feel like I'm suffering from information overload but at the same time it is all interlocking and overlapping from each of my classes. God has been teaching me so much through all of it. I just hope I can retain it and apply it. Sometime I will go into much more detail about the things I have been learning.

SIDE NOTE: This is my apology for not being a faithful blogger. College this semester has been crazy for me. Between classes, ministry, volunteering, etc. it has been pretty busy. So with all my excuses, I am sorry for not keeping up with the posts. Hopefully I will be able to do better, but I can't guarantee it. March's schedule looks just as hectic.

Because I have gotten so many things done today, I am going to work out tonight. So, I shall bid you adieu.

Random Picture of the Day

Nothing says "I love you" like a monster in a mug.

Licensed to Drive

Over my Christmas break, I had to study and take a test to get my license back. According to the law in the state of Iowa, anyone who is in an accident under the age of 21 has to take tests in order to keep their license. Fair enough.

So, of course, it had been a while since I have driven. This created nervousness that I thought I wouldn't be able to overcome. I had only driven twice before I took my test. First came the written test which turned out to be an oral test instead. I only missed one question! Thinking I would have to set up a driving time, I wasn't prepared to necessarily to do my driving test that day. However, God had other plans.

They decided to squeeze me in before someone else's time. After the car inspection, I took a deep breath and silently prayed that God would help me with this test because I really needed to get my license back. At times it was a bit bumpy, the examiner person was kinda new, but hey, we made it back in one piece. Once we were parked again by the court house, he set himself to the task of jotting more notes on his little clipboard, leaving me in painful suspense. How much more could he possibly have to write? After a little while, the lady in my back seat whose job it was to test the examiner spoke. She said she was pretty sure I passed and informed the examiner that he should have told me that as soon as we got back to the court house. He laughed a little and apologized. I had indeed passed my test!

Getting behind the wheel again was difficult, exciting, and been a challenge for me. Without my supportive dad, I don't know if I really would have been able to do it. His encouragement meant so much to me gave me the confidence that I needed to be able to put my foot to the pedal.

Since my test, I have driven around in my beloved car once again. Driving to school by myself for the first time in a long time was at first nerve racking, but the familiarity of the interstate helped me to stay calm enough. I almost thought I wouldn't be able to drive there, but my dad put most of my fear to rest when he told me that I was a good driver, I just needed to stay awake. His confidence in me and his words kept me from giving up as semis passed me by in the snowy weather on my way to school.

It's been nice to be able to drive again and go wherever I want, whenever I want. Do I still get nervous while driving? Yes. But such fear will not keep me from continuing to drive, and soon enough, that fear will subside. My God will help me and protect me. My dad will continue to encourage me and be there for me.