Cleaning Out the Junk

Ever get bored and decide, "Hey. I wonder what I'd find if I tried to google myself?"

I had this thought cross my mind the other day. And boy, I'm glad I did.

If you're around my age, then you may have this experience as well. Under the google search I rediscovered something I had put off dealing with for quite a while: the ghost myspace profile.

I used myspace before facebook had been around. And not only that, but I had used it with an e-mail address I don't use anymore. Thankfully, I was able to find a way to delete my old myspace profile.

However, that wasn't the worst thing I found. I had forgotten that I had a blog that existed before this one. And by blog... I mean online journal where I ranted quite a bit. Not only that, but my posts were all public! I was horrified as I read these posts. I was a younger, very selfish teenager who said very careless things that shouldn't be put on the Internet. Thankfully, I was able to delete this profile as well.

I can laugh now, thinking at my "angsty" and "me against the world" blog/journal. Happening upon that made me thankful for the salvation in Jesus Christ that I have. I am quite changed from the girl who   I was in high school, and I am SO thankful for it. This change in me? Totally not of myself but totally of God, Who continues to do a mighty work in me. I cringe to think of the girl who I used to be, who often lived by her emotions and always felt like everyone was against her. It is interesting to see how much I've changed.

Ever kept a journal? I did in high school. I "deleted" that too. I kept it with me through quite a bit of college, rereading my experiences, my emotions, the gains, the losses, etc. Whenever I felt nostalgic, I had picked up this journal, reading my thoughts written down on each page. Again, the person I was then was often torn, hurting, etc. It was interesting to see who I was before Christ changed my life, and how I slowly changed as I learned more about God and what the Bible said.It was a slow change, mind you. I struggled with so many things and never knew who to really turn to about my problems. God put a few people in my life, who I am still very thankful for, that tried to be there for me, teach me, point me to Christ. (After a time, I decided to throw that journal away. It was time to let go of a past that wasn't going to be my future. I had changed and that was that.) 

It wasn't until I attended a year of Bible college that I was able to really see past myself and understand what those people were truly trying to do for me. Lesson learned: Even if it looks like someone isn't responding to what you're saying, if you're trying to point them lovingly to Christ, don't give up! God's Word never returns void (Isaiah 55). God is so good!

Cleaning out the junk always feels so wonderful!